Max Rivers, "Loving Conflict: A New Alternative to Couples Counseling"
English | 2018 | ISBN: 0999863606 | 276 pages | AZW4 | 6.8 MB
Loving Conflict: How your unmet needs chose
your partner, fuel your arguments, and reveal the way to deep
connection.
This book describes how to use the skills we teach our clients, which we
call the Teamwork Method, in your own relationship. Once you have these
skills (even if it's only one of you that learns them) you will understand
why you keep having those same old arguments. You'll know what to do
differently and will be able to (finally!) unwrap the unopened gifts of
love and satisfaction that masquerade as conflict.
Why You Do Everything You Do and Say Everything You say
Probably the single most important contribution Marshall Rosenberg,
author of "NVC: A Language of Life" made to our understanding of
what motivates and confounds human interactions is his idea about
Universal Human Needs. Needs are a repository of universal wisdom
deep within us. Guided by that wisdom, our relationships flourish.
Without it, those very moments of potential inspiration instead can result
in those same old arguments.
During his mediation training, Max Rivers was taught to mediate the
interests and issues. He later tried mediating the relationship,
and eventually, by adding NVC into the mix, was able to get to the cause
of couples conflicts.
So, what is this book about? This book is about learning to apply the
skills of mediation to your own relationship.
It's about getting to the root cause of your conflict and
helping you learn to meet each other's needs.
It's about understanding what those arguments are really about
and learning how to get to the other side of them.
It's about learning the communication skills that can result in
fewer, shorter, less intense arguments, and actually getting to resolution.
Because the Teamwork Method is such a focused process, we can
reasonably predict how long it will take with most couples: six hour-and-a-half sessions: nine hours.
That turns out to be enough time to
teach most couples enough skills to be able to not only solve their
presenting issues, but to continue growing the intimacy of their
relationship.
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